The Five Deadly Snarks of Weddings: Snark #5–Divorce Snark

The Five Deadly Snarks of Weddings: 

#5 Divorce Snark

5. Snarks eluding to inevitable divorce. I have encountered this mainly from people who have been divorced, or from people who are cynical toward marriage because of divorce rates. Divorce is not an easy thing and I highly doubt anyone goes into their marriage hoping for divorce (unless they are a gold-digger, but that’s another topic entirely). If you have been divorced, listen up: Don’t use engaged couples as the dumping ground for your divorce baggage. Just because you got divorced doesn’t mean that everyone else will eventually divorce too. 

The divorce statistics in the US are around 50%, give or take a few percents. That means that there are another 50% of marriages, give or take a few percents, that actually do stay together. That means your marriage has an approximate 50/50 chance of ending or not ending in divorce. Reminds me of a coin toss. 

Here’s the thing: Your situation doesn’t apply to everyone else. I’ve had a lot of examples of lasting and healthy relationships, including my parents and my in-laws. They have both been married for 38-43 years. I believe that relationships can last and I want a shot at lasting love. Don’t ruin other’s happiness because you had a bad relationship. You have to learn to separate your feelings from what others might be feeling. 

Engaged couples already are filled with fear and doubt. Your cynicism might lead someone to back out of a good situation because they fear ending up like you. Sometimes you need to really look at the negativity you are projecting onto others. 

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